[TOOTS]

Let me explain. I'm BBC, so I look local can speak a little of the lingo but for work purposes would rather stick to english (in case I say anything wrong in chinese). I find that the locals kinda stick together and don't socialise with expats or BBC's like me. At lunch time they all just vanish and when I look around there are just the odd expat sitting on their own. Why do they do this?, can't they see that expats might want to socialise with them as well, it's hard enough to make friends here in HKG, and even so much harder at my work place.

T

[KnowItAll]

There was a decent article in the Standard the other day.

I'd recommend that you make it a point to ask a couple of people well in advance if they'd like to do lunch that day .... rather than wait till 12:45 and look around for people to go to lunch with.

If you're in a managerial position, make it a point to do a team lunch on Friday and expense it ...

[HKFella]

Originally Posted by TOOTS

Let me explain. I'm BBC, so I look local can speak a little of the lingo but for work purposes would rather stick to english (in case I say anything wrong in chinese). I find that the locals kinda stick together and don't socialise with expats or BBC's like me. At lunch time they all just vanish and when I look around there are just the odd expat sitting on their own. Why do they do this?, can't they see that expats might want to socialise with them as well, it's hard enough to make friends here in HKG, and even so much harder at my work place.

T

In that respect, (also re the article referred by KIA) not much has changed in HK since I first set foot here (1979), despite globalization, shrinking world, global village, blah blah. The macro picture is that the local-foreigner social/cultural divide remains alive and well. At micro level there are of course plenty of individual exceptions, but not of sufficient magnitude to change the macro scene. Language is one reason, but there are other factors at play too. Hmmm! looking back, it really was a fair bit easier to make local friends in Taipei than in HK, despite English being even less in use there. And in some countries south (and east) of here, the divide is hardly anything to speak of.

By the way, re what KIA said, sudden mass disappearance of local office staff for lunch in a puff of smoke at the appointed hour is religion here, so ignore it at your own peril. Specially the first shift (12 or 12-30). I take it for granted now, but many years ago was mind-blown when someone I was training at a computer terminal did an instant 12-noon disappearing act on me in the same puff of smoke, mid-sentence, when I turned away for 3 seconds to look at someone calling out to me. Lesson learnt!

[discobay]

Hey if you're that depressed I'll have lunch with you and then you'll know what depressed means!

[MR.LAM]

Hi Toots, Im a BBC but i get on with my colleague pretty well. But in general the arent as open as british co workers so you have make more of an effort and speaking in english wont help.

[carang]

i worked in an office setting for 6 months back in 1996....i was the only foreigner there. it took 3 months before anyone would say a work to me! finally, out of shear desperation and loneliness, i decided to just approach them and massacre their language(i'd only been here for a year at that time and couldn't speak much). once i was willing to lose face speaking their language, they were willing to lose face speaking mine.
after that, it was much better.

[kirlex]

As the poster above me mentioned, the biggest issue is that they are too affraid to speak English to you. At least this is from my experience. Why don't you initiate the conversation? This can help.

[cerberus]

hmmm. interesting topic. i like discovery bay's attitude, heh heh.
at any rate, it's a mixture of many things, however shyness is likely minor among them. live in most mainland cities and you'll have many more local acquiantances/friends et al than here, i think, despite their lower english exposure, similar to what was said of taibei. kinda makes you wonder how come people here missed out on centuries of english-speaking governance. regardless, this doesn't necessarily mean much, since for mainlanders a non-local person is still often something to get excited about, whereas for HK'ers it's overall no big deal, or even worse.
approaching people may or may not work, the ratio that'll become your friends won't change much.
don't worry, it's all yuan fen anyway, if it's meant to be, you'll hook up. can't force it, and you don't want to be with people on whom you've forced yourself anyway.

[jayinhongkong]

hehe...forcing urself on people can get you in trouble...if you find yourself in that situation, run!

and no, i'm not speaking from experience.

[muimui]

oh, sorry to you experience!
yeah, that's Chinese culture, they are very sociable and friendly exclusively to people inside their group!
it takes time to learn...good luck!