[Skyhook]

Originally Posted by redwriter

The bonding problem is a cop-out. It seems these two Europeans are incapable of loving their own children. Seems like the mother is a basket case, and the father is protected by the government. It would be best if non-Asians were not allowed to adopt children from Asian countries. I think they abused the child, since some reports said she was much happier now. The couple seems like the usual European sc*m.

Well guess what, Raymond Poeteray was in fact a Dutch national, of ASIAN ethnicity, so you can throw your warped/racist notion right out the window.

Redwriter, I sincerely request you make a public apology to the European online audience here, your remark is highly offensive and entirely unfounded.

Btw, the photo below is of a very Indonesian looking Raymond Poeteray, the guy wearing the orange vest holding the drink.


Regardless of the emotional outcry, I tend to agree with PDLM's logical train of thought. The experts were informed prior to putting the child in foster care, their advice was followed. At the end of the day, we don't have all the facts, just what the press has selectively aired.

I am not saying what ended up happening was right, but without having all of the info relating to this case, its a bit unfair for any of us to judge the parents.

Also consider that the parents followed the advice of the many experts on record, that advised the foster care of the little girl. Lets not fall victim to the media frenzy, sensationalising this story into something much more than it was.

[PDLM]

Originally Posted by minhk

Never once have I heard their parents say... I give up, can you please just look after my child instead!!!

And you still haven't. What you have heard is the Social Welfare Department saying: "We believe it would be in the best interests of this child if it were placed temporarily in a different environment". And the parents eventually accepting that advice.

I'm trying to find the stats on how often this happens in Hong Kong. I can't immediately, but I can see that SWD has over 700 kids in foster homes and about 2000 more in various other facilities for one reason or another. (Source: http://www.swd.gov.hk/doc/annreport/0304annrepe.pdf p24ff )

[Krad]

Originally Posted by Skyhook

Well guess what, Raymond Poeteray was in fact a Dutch national, of ASIAN ethnicity, so you can throw your warped/racist notion right out the window.

Redwriter, I sincerely request you make a public apology to the European online audience here, your remark is highly offensive and entirely unfounded.

Btw, the photo below is of a very Indonesian looking Raymond Poeteray, the guy wearing the orange vest holding the drink.

Damn, if that was my dad, I'd have bonding issues too.

[Krad]

Oh, wait, nm. I thought you were talking about the guitarist.

[freeier]

this world has alot of ppl that like to take things into their own hand and determine the best course of action base on faith and beliefs.

e.g. if someone has a contagious disease (small pox ? SAR ?) they wld rather bring the kid home because that's where the warmth is and they get cured best ? etc ?

medical advise is medical advise. we have also seen kids being given up by the natural parents after years because of issues related to bringing them up. physical difficulties ? medical difficulties ? etc..

[monarch_50]

It is true one should not blame the parents without having the full picture.

It is also true that one should not just take the expert opinion on face value. If the parents keep insisting they have cultural/food/bonding problems, what can the expert say? Maybe the expert might be under pressure from the diplomat too?

All in all, there should be a more civilised way to review things, such as through a judicial review to see whether all angles, including the welfare of this Korean child, have been considered.

[beachball]

Originally Posted by sunniefaith

Moved to a temporary home where she never saw her supposedly parents again? So that's not abandoned, then what's that called? Are her parents taking her back? Have they seen her in the year that she was in foster home?

My understanding is that the opposite is the case: The (adoptive) parents do want to see the girl again, but are currently not allowed, to based on the advise/guidance from doctors and other experts.

Also, if I understand correctly, the girl has been treated/evaluated for over a year, but only been put in a Foster home recently (not for a year).

I do feel very, very sorry for the little girl, but I do think that people are rushing to a judgment without a full or correct set of facts. In fact, I feel very sorry for the adoptive parents as well - truly everyboyd loses/is suffering here.

[Krad]

On the upsides, dates would be a lot more interesting.

"Maybe we should just go Dutch tonight"

"Well, OK, but where are we going to find a small Korean child at this time of night?"

[XI_YAN]

yeah isn't the mother even more guilty? weird kind of male-centricism going on.

[Krad]

Originally Posted by beachball

My understanding is that the opposite is the case: The (adoptive) parents do want to see the girl again, but are currently not allowed, to based on the advise/guidance from doctors and other experts.

Also, if I understand correctly, the girl has been treated/evaluated for over a year, but only been put in a Foster home recently (not for a year).

I do feel very, very sorry for the little girl, but I do think that people are rushing to a judgment without a full or correct set of facts. In fact, I feel very sorry for the adoptive parents as well - truly everyboyd loses/is suffering here.

Ah, but see, the difference is that the Dutch couple are grown ups, and so would hopefully understand the consequences and realities of such actions, whereas the little Korean kid doesn't exactly have the same knowledge. I'd say one party here is losing a lot more than the other.