[MelissaM]

Hi all,


I have a cousin's whose friend's hubby cheated on her time and again before marriage, during dating and after the birth of the 3rd child.
Every so often she confronted him and he will just brush it off as a form of entertainment as he needs to go to China across the border very so often.

In view of that, she finally caught him in action without PIs with the man's mistress...sex partner or fling that whatever its named...but he showed no remorse and worst said that all his other business associates are doing it.

I am just curious how much do all of you trust your hubby or are u just able to shut an eye and get on with your daily lives?

Having put forth the above situation.. what would the immediate actions that you people will take?

[Boris]

As a man ---

Quote " I have a cousin's whose friend's hubby cheated on her time and again before marriage, during dating and after the birth of the 3rd child."

So he was doing it BEFORE and STILL she married him.
He probably did it afterwards did it afterwards but STILL she STAYED married to him and not just after the third child.

Methinks if she had said that she really knew he was putting it about ALL THE TIME then everyone would have given the same reply . " Why did you marry him in the first place " and had no further emotional involvement.

Girls - you always think you can change him. -- WRONG !

So only now does she want to do something about it and is looking for some sort of anti confirmation because , she knows and you know that there is only one person to blame.

The woman will say its the mans fault, cos all men are B*****d's right. Those with some semblance of common sense will have a different view !

[HKChigger]

May be a good read to check out latest Hong Kong Magazine. Article in there states 10 out of 10 men want to cheat. It's only those that have the guts to do it that actually do.

Also mentions if you think something is going on it is best not to dig too far if you aren't prepared to face what you might find.

Does you cousin know why she was trying to catch it in action? Why? How does that question end up here instead of her dealing with her plan?

[Sleuth]

I would disagree with that 10 out of 10 thing, but I haven't read the article and it could be couched in all sorts of qualifiers.
From my experience with guys who do this, they were doing it in high school with girlfriends and before the engagement and before the marriage and are still doing it. Something just isn't right in their heads (in my opinion). Boris is right--you can't change them.
And I don't think that the wives are 0 out of 10.

[HKChigger]

I agree with the 10 out of 10, simply because in bigger numbers 10 out of 10 could turn in to 99 or 98 out of 100 etc. Doesn't mean 100%, but it does mean most men.

The reason I agree with it is because I don't know one guy who doesn't think about other women, even seeing a hottie in the street or on TV could relate to cheating thoughts (or wanting to sleep with that girl) Once again it doesn't mean they will do it, but the desire passes through them.

Complicated subject none the less.

[Skyhook]

Locally I tend to agree with the 10 -10 scenario from what I have observed, and heard. For the record I don't think about other women, nor would I give the time of day to another woman in the street, I love my lopor 100%.

I think needy men who have no loyalty to their women are scum, you certainly wouldnt make friends with someone like that... Think about it, if they would cheat the holy of holy, imagine what they are doing behind your back...

I will point out, its rampant here in Hong Kong, because it seems to be an accepted behavior among the locals, as well as the rascal expats, if it happened back home, it was of the very clandestine well hidden variety. Never blatant, as it would cost you a promotion back home if your family character was in doubt. Ha Ha says a lot about here though.....

[Boris]

Isn't interesting that all the replies are from guys.

Maybe because the postings have been very accurate and well thought out.

Women hate it when you win the argument !

[Stoob]

If the "cheating" you refer to is merely the husband enlisting the services of mainland "chicken" girls while he's there for work, I do not see what the fuss is about.

[Brown_By_Nature]

Originally Posted by Stoob

If the "cheating" you refer to is merely the husband enlisting the services of mainland "chicken" girls while he's there for work, I do not see what the fuss is about.

So according to you screwing hookers is ok and shouldn't be considered cheating??

Don't we wish all women had the same view.

[frogman]

Originally Posted by Stoob

If the "cheating" you refer to is merely the husband enlisting the services of mainland "chicken" girls while he's there for work, I do not see what the fuss is about.

And the fact that hubby might be putting his family at risk by picking up some nasty disease isn't a problem? (and I'm not talking about bird flu...)